The Four Little Pigs vs. the Big Bad Covid

Once upon a time there were four little pigs. They heard there was a Big Bad Covid in the area looking to infect anyone it could. This Big Bad Covid made people huff and puff and struggle to breathe. The four little pigs each chose to make different plans.

The first little pig did several things. He started staying home more in his house made of brick. When he had to go out, he wore a face covering over his nose and his mouth and made every effort to stay at least 6 feet away from everyone he saw. In addition, he washed his hands frequently, avoided surfaces of dubious cleanliness, and did not touch his face. He also got vaccinated against the Big Bad Covid at his earliest opportunity.

The first little pig never got caught by the Big Bad Covid.

The second little pig grew tired of staying home in his house made of sticks, and started to go out much more. He wanted to go to parties and concerts and sporting events again. He wore his mask, usually correctly, and had gotten his shots, but he did not observe social distancing. Unfortunately, not everyone else at these public events wore their face coverings. Some of them sneezed or coughed or yelled in those public places.

The second little pig was caught by the Big Bad Covid and was ill for several days. Fortunately, his mask had reduced the total viral load that he was exposed to and his vaccination had taught his immune system how to immediately go to work to fight the infection. He never had to go to the hospital and his body eventually chased off the Big Bad Covid.

The third little pig got vaccinated and thought that he could now go back to his life as it had been. He left his straw house and began to party as if the Big Bad Covid was dead. He did not wear a bothersome mask, he did not social distance from anyone, and he got careless about washing his hands.

The Big Bad Covid caught the third little pig and dragged him straight to the hospital. The beleaguered and badly overworked doctors and nurses did their best to help him, but ultimately the thing that saved his life was the vaccination he had had weeks before. His body was gradually able to chase off the Big Bad Covid.

The fourth little pig wasn’t afraid of the Big Bad Covid at all. When the stores and the schools and the entertainment venues started to open back up he was delighted and never bothered to build a house — brick, sticks, or straw. He bragged about his “freedom” to not get the vaccination. He never wore an “oppressive” facemask, and even lobbied so his school-aged kids didn’t have to wear them in school. He socialized with anyone he wanted to, even complete strangers, and thought social distancing was a plot to control people.

One day the Big Bad Covid grabbed the fourth little pig. Within a week, he took the little pig to the hospital, then the Intensive Care Unit, and then the cemetery.

The fourth little pig was greatly surprised at the unfair turn of events.

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